inevitable.

Presently, my AIM profile reads simply

'inevitable.'

Apparently this single word has served its purpose. It seems to have made a handful of people consider something outside of their everyday lives. A few have come to me with the obvious question: WHAT IS INEVITABLE?

In a conversation with PyroniC the answer seemed to come naturally.

...

So what is inevitable?

Let us try a different question, first. What ISN'T inevitable? PyroniC's answer was 'five cheeseburgers for five dollars at McDonald's?' That would seem impossible, yes--for in our growing capitalist and selfish economy we can focus on nothing but competition and getting the most 'buck for the biggest bang.' But what else? What is absolutely controlable? What do you know you can stop from happening? Not prevent ... not hinder ... because prevention is the easy way out. Prevention is a nice way to place something on the back burner until it actually boils over--then the answer is always 'well, it was just meant to happen. There's nothing we could have done to stop it.'

Responsibility. Why can't anyone just take responsibility for mistakes, misfortunes, misinterpretations? Because it is easier to curse the stars. 'Twas fate.' 'The will of God has been done.' 'This was nothing if not inevitable.'

So the world is trying to convince me that death is necessarily inevitable. That misfortune is unavoidable. Perhaps it is. Perhaps misfortune on one level or another is, in fact, completely out of our hands. But i argue that some things just cannot be inevitable. War. War amongst countries, ideals, races, religions, brothers--how can this be the 'right' way to live. The 'natural' order of things? Why must such a thing exist? Yes, i'll give you that disagreements take place, interventions are necessary, and, being as we are fickle humans, equilibrium may never be achieved in our society. But why must violence rise amongst perfectly good people?

You may have noticed i say 'amongst'--because it is. We all live in this world together, not separately, but together--all part of one encompassing circle. And here, in war, two people fight against each other with passion and fury in their eyes without even knowing what they are really fighting. They fight the enemy. That is all they know. They do not fight a man. Not a son. Not a brother. Not a father, nor friend, nor neighbour. But the enemy. Yet somehow, i manage to find respect for people on both 'sides'. They all fight with passion, for something they believe in, or once believed in. They sacrifice their lives for shaping of the world. Without one 'side' or the other nothing would happen. Nothing would change. These people dedicate their lives to changing the world. And how often are they noticed?

Not often enough.

And after all of that, i return to the conversation with PyroniC:

PyroniC: WHAT IS INEVITABLE?
PyroniC: Ben Franklin would say Death and Taxes.
Me: yes .. but there is more than that.
Me: There is Life. Life is inevitable.

Is that fathomable? Just imagine Life being inevitable. Friendship, Inspiration, Living ... now THAT is inevatible. That's what i never dreamed could happen. Then one day i realized that there is nothing to stop any of it. It's just a question of how long it will take to happen. This of course both sets me free to Live, but also brings Life into slow motion, because i know what will come will come. This is God's will for us: to Live and share Life.

There was a boy--seven years old. He shared his Life with me, and i'm sure he doesn't even realize it. One of the many people i don't think i'll ever forget. Coming from a hispanic household, his parents both worked to keep the boy and his two brothers comfortable. The boy would tell me of his home and his family--always grateful for what he had been given. ..He loved puzzles. i watched him, one morning, as he worked on a puzzle. Once the puzzle was complete he sat back and we both gazed at the pieces as they fit together and the picture took shape. It was a beach, and you could see the ocean fade into the sky. There were animals in the puzzle--dolphins, starfish, coral, crabs, sea gulls. He pointed some of the unfamiliar animals and asked what they were. Once satisfied with my descriptions he continued to tell me that he'd never been to the ocean, and that one day he hoped he could see it. He spoke of that puzzle several times, asking what the ocean is like, and how many different creatures can you see if you visit the ocean. But that's all he wanted--not money, not a bigger house, not more food. Just to visit the ocean someday. i admire that boy. He understood Life. He understood that he had love from his family and friends, had the freedom to believe that something was out there to look forward to--something better than society, had the courage to reach for the stars, and had the discipline to not expect more from Life than he needed. i pray he doesn't lose that.

i've found Life. Finally it has come--and all at once in this rage of colour and sound and emotion. Life--and i no longer feel guilty for finding it. The guilt i feel comes from not sharing this Life--all of it--and perhaps for having Life at the expense of others. What right do i have to taste Life? Why am i granted warmth and comfort? Who am i to deserve this? The simple answer: i don't. And i may never know why i am given such things.

And as i sit here, i only wish i could paint Life with the gentle strokes of my grandmother's paintbrush, or write a song that could pack it all into a six minute serenade. Now the question falls to us--

What will we do with this Life?