restless.

i befriend the Darkness.
a glimmer of Light is hope in Darkness, which,
in the sun, the hope cannot be seen.
the sun overpowers
the small Glimmers.
and my Shadows--they walk as i do
before me.
behind me.
beside me.
all one of the same--but distorted.
some tall, some short,
showing where i've been,
where i will be,
where i am--
but all distorted.
and what changes them?
Light.
their creator twists vision.
Perception.
Truth.
and if hope is this glimmer of Light
and Truth is found in the Shadows
hope, then, disrupts Truth.
and i am to trust this Light?
this Traitor who tells all and alters Truth?
No. i won't. i can't..
the sun rises--
the Shadows are being hidden.
has risen--
the Traitor is fading.
and will rise again--
what are we left with?
i live among the Shadows.
i befriend the Darkness.


--

Completely restless. And why ... i've no idea.

The world i live in is not the same as theirs. When They enter my world, once They finally understand it, They will then understand me--as much as i understand myself, at least. Perhaps then They will be able to see me for what i am, and what i've become. But what have i become? What am i? Y que estoy haciendo aqui? Do You really want to know me ... do You really want to understand?

No. Likely not, i imagine. And if yes, find me sometime in my wanderings as i get lost among all the other faces ... find me and ask me what i know of myself, and only if You have the time. If You don't want to take the time, i will not take offense. In fact, i thank You for not asking for my trust--a trust that would have been misguided. This isn't only for me, though--this is for the world. Look to Them ... who do You want to know and who do You not? Decide now, before You ask anymore of Them.

...

i fear losing what little i've found and managed to hold on to for the present.

a walk.
a ledge.
a thought.
a song.
a sky.
a star.
a dream.

Without such things, how will i live? i know i'll survive..but i want to live. 'What do you want?' You implore ... i want happiness for You. i want Life for You. and for me? ... i just want to breathe again. i want to find warmth and sleep.