An experiment in freedom

Libertad veradera.
Vida verdadera.
Percepciones verdaderas.

A new experiment in freedom.

I've been told for months that I should get an online journal. My friends have told me about a place to vent, express, and even engage in a random piece or two. A kind of "true freedom". This is a place for me--my writing and expression. While I say that this a "place for me", I also realize someone will probably read this 'online journal' at some point, for one reason or another. I hesitate to share anything. Prehaps from fear of judgment of others--or even self-reflection.

Structure, rules, and boundaries--this is all I've ever known, I think. True freedom is almost foreign. I feel nearly guilty at the thought of it. But the paradox in all of this is that my constrictive guilt is permitted here. And that, my friends, is amazingly liberating--it is in fact possible to have a place where I can feel safe, comfortable, and still be allowed to express myself. Here there are no boundaries, there are no rules.

The question is, however, how is self-expression even possible now? I've kept everything simmering inside my head for safe keeping. And now I discover this overwhelming freedom of expression. Yes, just now--while the American people are on the brink of sacrificing their freedoms, I discover it. How long will this new sense of freedom last? And why do I feel as though I'm deluding myself? This can't be real. This can't be happening. But it is--I am now permitted to feel how I want to feel, think anything I care to think, and express it.

This is my territory--this is my freedom--this is my anarchy.